The New Normal

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This is the first time I’ve had a chance to sit down and collect my thoughts in a couple weeks. With PhD visiting consecutive weekends (surprise and then planned) and parent conferences and wrapping up things at school and working on getting Christmas presents for everyone and preparing to be gone for two weeks-Indiana and then LA, I really haven’t had a chance to write about any of my thoughts.

During PhD’s last visit here, we went to see a therapist as a couple. First time I’ve ever been to a therapist as a couple. She, however, has been to a therapist with each one of her previous partners. Red flag? I don’t know. PhD produced a document that she had compiled of everything she could remember that transpired regarding BG from the beginning. The document irritated me, but I couldn’t get mad about it because it was pretty much the timeline of events. The session itself was kind of terrible because it was short. We ended up talking about what we thought the issues of the relationship, but there was no resolution. I left feeling like PhD was mad at me because of everything the session had brought up again. She apparently was paranoid that I was going to break up with her at any moment. We were able to talk everything through at dinner afterwards and get things between us back to semi-normality. The rest of the weekend consisted of more talking about what was happening between us. By the end of her visit, I think things were finally ok between us.

Things seem to be back to normal with us. I’m back to not talking to BG which I guess is normal. The new normal. In my last individual therapy session, I told my therapist I wanted to work on trying to get over BG. The night before I had had a dream about BG. I can’t remember the details of it, but I remember her looking down on me, like she was perched in a tree. I could sense that she was there, but I didn’t/couldn’t talk to her. My therapist was trying to get me to see some significance in the dream. I don’t know what the dream was about. I know I should probably say something to BG since she left it as I was supposed to have a long think about things. I still don’t have anything new to say to her though. And I’m sure she doesn’t want to hear what she’s heard before. So, I’ll remain quiet until I have something new to say to her.

In other news, I had one of the worst parent conferences I’ve ever had in my 12 years of teaching. The parents plus grandma came in ready to rumble. I told my administrators that I would not be by myself in a meeting with this family again this year. I’ve never been in such a situation. I’ve been in some very hard meetings with parents. I’ve had parents tell me to my face that their child doesn’t like me or that I need to change something about my class. But what I experienced with this family was more than that. It was bizarre and uncalled for. And it’s really unfortunate that the family, mainly the wackadoo mom had to act that way. She’s doing a huge disservice to her son and he’s the one that needs extra help. Sometimes parents need to just step back and let their egos take a seat.

So as I start my two week vacation from life in NYC and conclude 2015, I am reminded that I do in fact have a wonderful life, and while there may be days that suck, my life as a whole is still pretty damn wonderful.



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